Game Knight

I love my little castle up here on this hill. Sure, it’s a little dusty and there are spiderwebs everywhere. Also some of the masonry is starting to crumble a bit. But it’s got this cool moat with way less than two dozen snakes in it! It’s a perfectly charming little castle, so why does no one from the village ever hike up here to visit? The mailman doesn’t even come up here. It’s ridiculous. Oh, and also the roof is missing. I should have mentioned that. But still, it’s a great castle in my opinion. People should visit.

That’s life when you’re a knight, I suppose. The villagers are probably a little intimidated by me. I’ve heard stories about knights and let me tell you, some of those guys are dicks. But I promise I’m not like that! I don’t even have a sword! Or armor! Or a horse! I’m not like those other knights. You might be thinking, “No sword, no armor, no horse? How can you be a knight?” To you I say that being a knight is just kind of a vibe. I give off knight vibes. If you met me, you’d agree. Besides, if I’m not a knight, how’d I get this castle? 

I’ve really tried to meet some of those villagers and maybe make some friends, but nothing I’ve done seems to work. I’ve walked down to the village a couple times and people are always friendly, but I feel like they kind of keep their distance. One time I said “hey” to a guy and he straight up ran away! Who DOES that!?

Things might be turning around for me though. I sent a bunch of invites out for a game night and only the blacksmith responded, but that’s a start! I hope he isn’t too weirded out by this being a two-person game night now. I also hope he brings a game or something because I certainly don’t have any. Maybe games are something you should have before you decide to host a game night. My bad. I’ll try to remember for next time. 

I hear a “knock knock” and I know my guest has arrived. He literally said “knock knock”. He had to say it because the door is gone too (sorry, I forgot to mention that earlier). 

“Come in, come in!” I shout, hurrying towards the door. 

A sturdy-looking, bearded man in a roughspun tunic cautiously enters my great hall. He notices me immediately and he smiles, but his eyes dart around the room, taking in his surroundings. 

“Hey,” he says, “am I…uh, am I early?” 

“No!” I boom enthusiastically. “You’re the only guest and you’re just in time! I just finished putting together the charcuterie board.” I gesture towards the board I’ve stacked high with meat and cheese. “Help yourself! That’s real, fresh-caught snake meat, by the way.”

He eyes the spread and says, “Oh, I, uh…maybe later. I’m not hungry right now.”

“No problem! I guess it’s just more for charcuter-me!” I laugh loudly, maybe a little too loudly, and a large stone breaks free somewhere in the castle and lands with a rumbling crash. 

The noise startles the blacksmith and he lets out a small yelp. He starts to back away from me, towards the exit. 

“Where are you going?” I ask, in what I hope is a non-threatening manner. 

He stumbles a bit, but stops and meets my gaze. He takes a deep breath. 

“Look,” he says, “I was intrigued by the invitation and I wanted to be nice, but this…” He gestures broadly around at the crumbling castle, at me, and at the charcuterie board. “It’s all a bit…too much, I guess. I don’t feel safe here. You don’t even have any furniture!” 

I shrug. “Flammable stuff never seems to last long around here.” 

He glances up at the yawning expanse where the roof should be. “That’s understandable I suppose. Look, maybe if you want to try again in-”

“What do you mean?”

He pauses. “...what?”

“You said it’s understandable that flammable stuff never lasts around here. What did you mean by that?”

He wobbles a bit from side to side and furrows his brow. Finally he says, “I mean, you do breathe fire.”

It’s my turn to shift uncomfortably. Flames do shoot out of my mouth sometimes, but I’m pretty careful about trying to make sure it only happens when no one else is around. How could he possibly know that I do that? I’ve always just assumed all knights do that. Maybe that’s how he knows.

“Are you saying that because I’m a knight?” I ask.

He snorts. “Yeah sure, because you’re a knight.”

Is that sarcasm I detect? I’m never quite sure. “Did you not know I’m a knight?” 

He laughs, but looks confused. “...what? Are you joking?”

I’m a little hurt by this. Just because I don’t have a horse, or armor, or a sword, doesn’t mean that I’m not a knight. I’m just about to tell him off, or maybe more (sometimes the flames come when I get upset) but his genuine confusion gives me pause. His expression softens as he watches me. He slowly approaches and puts his hand on my shoulder. 

“Buddy,” he says, “You’re a dragon. Did you really not know?”

I laugh. “A dragon? Don’t be ridic-” Suddenly I’m hit with a flood of memories. Signs I missed over the years that maybe he was right. The fire breathing, for one. Also maybe the wings and scales. Oh, and I ate the guy that used to live here. That was probably a sign too. I sit down heavily, causing the ground to shake.

The blacksmith pats my scaly shoulder again. “Hey, it’s not a bad thing, you know? We actually kind of like you down in the village. We thought we’d never get rid of that evil king before you came along and ate him.”

“THAT’S who that guy was!? I thought he was a gold hat enthusiast.”

The blacksmith laughs. “Well, whatever your reason was, we were all really glad you did that.”

The blacksmith decides to stay and we have a genuinely fun evening. Since he didn’t bring any games we end up playing some old classics I used to play with mom like “I Spy With My Giant Lizard Eye” (maybe that game name should have been another clue). 

At the end of night the blacksmith tells me he’ll come back at the same time next week, and maybe bring some friends! So overall, a successful game night I would say. I may still not know many villagers, but now I know myself, and that’s a start.

THE END